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Cat Treats - The Tale of Paolo

Paolo the lazy freeloafer![/caption]I would love to talk about my lovely cat Paolo but unfortunately he is far from lovely!

Paolo is a cute looking kitty with soft white fur and a disdainful nature. Sadly, it’s always Paolo’s way or the highway and he is quite capable of biting or even delivering an all-out attack if anything is not to his liking.

Fussy Eater

His rather particular nature extends to his diet. He is a fussy and inconsistent eater. On some days he will gobble down several plates of food, on other he eats next to nothing. This behaviour may be connected to his hunting activities or could be merely a tactic to ensure that I don’t get too comfortable with the routine.

It can also be next to impossible to purchase the right food. The expensive brands that he cherishes for a few days will suddenly be rejected. I am often forced to offer several alternatives before I find a suitable replacement. The suitable replacement is often my own dinner!

The Scarlet Pimpernel

I know that it is a mistake to offer human food but in the face of all that whining, resistance can be futile. Paolo is also in the habit of jumping onto the dining table without warning. He is like the and gains access to the room under the radar before flying onto the table like an Exocet missile and launching an assault at whichever dinner plate is closest. If you shut him out of the room he will deconstruct the door in an attempt to gain access.

Dreamies Cat Treats

The only things, apart from my peppered steaks, which are guaranteed to please a pouting Paolo are cat treats. He absolutely adores Cat treats and will whinge and whine for those treats at anybody in the house. This has included the kitchen fitter, the boiler repair man and the poor guy who came to fix the dishwasher. These performances are so irritating that they just wear you into submission. Paolo’s favourite treats are Dreamies. One whiff of those little biscuits and Paolo mutates into a relentless monster.

Crisps and Crumbs

The trouble is that Paolo now associates all small packets with Dreamies. I cannot even think about eating a packet of crisps without Paolo jumping all over me to get at the spoils. Inevitably I end up giving him whatever crisps or snacks I am trying to eat which means he has developed a taste for those too. He particularly loves cheesy puffs but is incapable of eating them without spraying hundreds of crumbs everywhere and dropping soggy half chewed debris all over the sofa.

I now keep a huge supply of cat treats in the kitchen cupboard which are used as bribes, distractions and silencers in equal measure. If I need Paolo to cooperate with me the cat treats are often the only way that I can achieve this most difficult of feats. I am engaged in an ongoing battle of wills which will doubtless culminate in Paolo learning how to get into the cupboard. I am thinking of investing in a safe!


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